The answer is: sometimes.
But only if you answer yes to any of the following questions:
- Is it useful?
- Does it help me create the life I want?
- Is there anything in it for me?
Ok, time for an example to contextualise all this.
Let’s say I’m teaching a yoga class and I straight out forget to do an *entire sequence* on one side (gasp!).
I might tell myself: “you’re an idiot and a terrible yoga teacher.“
Let’s apply those 3 questions to this neggy thought.
Is it useful:
Is mentally battering myself about the head going to make me spring into action, and start playing memory games for two hours per day to prevent me from ever forgetting anything ever again? Nope. It’s just gonna make me feel worse about myself.
Does it help me create the life I want:
A super duper important value in my life is experimentation over perfection. I place so much value on being curious, on having a go, and on not fixating on the outcome. I repeat this over and over in my classes, in my content, in everything I do, really. Demanding perfection and then beating myself up when I fall short is actually a big step back from the life I want to live and the values that are important to me.
Is there anything in it for me:
This thought brings me nothin’ but shame, self-judgement and a knock to my self-confidence, meaning that letting it guide me guarantees that I won’t show up to my next class as a better, more resilient teacher. So not only am I getting nothing out of it, I’m actually losing something to it.
It’s def time to say Bye Felicia to that one.
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